Cannabis has never been more popular. Between legality running through the country like wildfire, staggering fiscal numbers floating state economies, and a general air of growing social acceptance, it may seem silly to hide your stash. However, judgement seared into our collective psyche by the War on Drugs is still at play. As silly as it may be, not everyone is ready for you to light up a joint instead of a cigarette outside the restaurant.
This year alone, 14 more states could legalize cannabis. According to Forbes, “The legal cannabis market was worth an estimated $7.2 billion in 2016 and is projected to grow at a compound annual rate of 17%. Medical marijuana sales are projected to grow from $4.7 billion in 2016 to $13.3 billion in 2020. Adult recreational sales are estimated to jump from $2.6 billion in 2016 to $11.2 billion by 2020.” With numbers like these, even the notoriously pious (see: backwards) morals of states like Mississippi and Kentucky have their price.
Police, too, are coming around to the undeniable fact that the War on Drugs, one of America’s great embarrassments, has been a complete failure, resulting in overflowing jails that cost taxpayers millions, while destroying an unfathomable number of lives in the process.
Despite how far we’ve come, squares still, and will always, exist. Whether taking the form of Jeff Sessions, a nosy RA, or your ceaselessly annoying upstairs neighbor, the need for discretion still has a place in the weed world. Until said lames catch up with the rest of us, here are a few discrete tools to make getting stoned as conflict-free as it should always be.
Erbanna’s Maxwell B. Wallet Kit and Glass Keeper Backpack
Whether a joint clip in a cigarette pack, or the blackened bowl of a one hitter left over in the glove box, true stoners are never without weed. The problem with this: weed smells, especially after it’s been lit.
Erbanna products use smell proof zippers and fun, sleek designs to solve the age-old issue of walking around smelling irresponsible. This subtle little container, the Maxwell B. Wallet Kit, holds a card grinder, one hitter, and two small rubber containers, locking in any residual scent with a rubber smell-proof zipper. It’s perfect for throwing in your bag before going out with friends, or remaining anonymous on public transportation.
And, if you’re really bout that life, check out Erbanna’s Kate Glass Keeper Backpack, preferably in snakeskin. In addition to being a cute mini backpack for summer, it features a secret bottom compartment with customizable foam for holding bongs etc. Throw your weed in the Wallet Kit, and the Wallet Kit in the backpack, and you’re ready for the ultimate adventure.
PUFFit Inhaler Vaporizer
While there are no shortage of discrete vaporizers on the market, this one is quite possibly the funniest, and most inconspicuous. Looking in every way like an inhaler, PUFFit’s Inhaler Vaporizer will perplex anyone who sees you using it.
As we all know, cannabis vapor smells but doesn’t linger. Though you will quietly blow out a cloud smelling like pot, all people will see is someone warding off an asthma attack, and it’s rude to stare. With a USB charger, temperature gauge, and great online reviews, this is the vape to choose if you’re really that afraid of getting caught in the act.
Smoke Buddy Personal Air Filter
The Smoke Buddy is, in my opinion, a billion dollar idea. This little guy has saved my ass a number of times, from college dorms and subway cars, to the back of busses and my grandma’s living room.
A huge improvement from the paper towel roll contraption we’re all guilty of attempting at one time or another (aka, the “sploof”), simply blow your smoke into the filter and clean air comes out the other side. This device is perfect for anyone who lives in a non-smoking situation, whether it be at your parent’s house, or, more seriously, in a federally-subsidized housing situation. Medical cards don’t always matter to landlords. Many patients have faced eviction due to the medicine they utilize to cope with conditions. For anyone dealing with anyone who doesn’t support constant pot consumption, Smoke Buddy will save your ass!
SafeInside Flower Pot Diversion Safe
A take on the classic stash soda can — or any other of the infinite objects that look normal but actually hold weed — the Flower Pot Diversion Safe is especially genius. Coming in terracotta and a darker shade, the top of the pot where the plant lives can be removed, revealing a key-locked safe hidden in its bottom portion.
There are very few situations in which the person looking for your stash, whomever they may be, would literally rip a plant from it’s pot in order to find your weed. That said, if you’re indebted to the mob for a few grand, or someone else who would tear your entire room apart to find something, this could be a great investment to consider.
For more on this secret stash safe, visit Wayfair.com
This summer, keep authority at bay with these trappings of a secret stoner. Your boss will be none the wiser, and your family never needed to know the staggering amount of weed you consume anyway.
Whether taking the form of Jeff Sessions, a nosy dorm RA, or your ceaselessly annoying upstairs neighbor, the need for discretion still has a place in the weed world.
Sometimes you might be down to puff in a place where you’d rather keep it on the down low. Check out this selection of discrete pipes, stealthy weed gadgets and secret smoking devices.
There are tons of ways to smoke secretly at home or take a discreet toke outside. Some devices like portable vaporizers and vapor pens don’t have much smell at all. But if you’re smoking some dank stank sticky icky, you might want to check out smoke filtering devices like the Smoke Buddy.
And if you’re just on the lookout for cool inconspicuous devices, there are so many awesome stealthy stoner devices to choose from, like the Silver Stick discreet metal one hitter pipe with a filter, or the super slick 7vn aluminum dugout that looks like a Zippo! And ya gotta love a keychain pipe.
Whatever you’re looking for, if it’s sneaky smoking swag, you’re in the right place!
SILVERSTICK FILTERED ONE-HITTER
You’re classy. I can tell by the way you clicked on this product. You were like, click. And now here we are. So let’s talk about this cool filtered one-hitter, you classy thing, you. This is the SilverStick, a metal one-hitter with a filter! That’s right, the SilverStick unscrews to accommodate a replaceable filter .
STASHLIGHT STASH LIGHTER
If you like a good combo, you’re gonna love this. It’s the StashLight, a lighter with a built-in stash compartment! This tubular little guy is a combination doob tube and lighter. It’s pretty much everything you need, all rolled up into one. Take it on a hike, take it on a bike, take it any where you like. You might .
ODOR PROOF DUGOUT SYSTEM
Shhh! Did you smell that? Me neither. And it’s all thanks to this stealthy, snazzy, totally odor-proof dugout! It’s the UndurCuvur One Dugout, a really cool take on the classic, beloved dugout smoking system. The UndurCuvur One sports a glass stash jar wrapped in dense, impact-resistant silicone along with a .
STEALTHY “KEY FOB” VAPE
The stealthy MiniMax PRO Vaporizer is a tiny vaporizer that looks like a key fob! Did you forget your keys? Well you just might after a few rips off the MiniMax. This compact, discrete little vaporizer looks just like a key fob, and it accepts standard oil concentrate cartridges! Just flip it open and puff away. This .
ULTRA COMPACT MIQRO VAPORIZER
Sleek, sophisticated, powerful. and so, so tiny! No, it’s not Judge Judy. It’s the DaVinci Miqro Compact Vaporizer. There’s lots to love about the adorable Miqro. A compact, super stealth vaporizer for dry herb, DaVinci Miqro Vaporizer will be your new best friend. This thing is so small, it fully fits inside the .
RYOT WOODEN DUGOUT
If there’s one thing I know about you, it’s that you’re one classy son of a bitch. And there’s nothing that classy sons of bitches like more than rich, exotic wood. That’s why you, my friend, are going to want to check out this lovely Wooden Dugout One Hitter from RYOT. The RYOT wooden dugout is a classic smoking .
SMELLPROOF LOCKABLE BACKPACK
If you find yourself on-the-go with the stinkiest of the stankiest sticky icky (or any other smelly cargo, for that matter), you gotta check out this 100% smellproof backpack from Skunk Bags. That’s right, 100% smellproof power is comin right atcha courtesy of the high tech fabrics and linings incorporated into this .
It’s a classy flask with a stealthy stash. Bam. Check out the Accomplice Flask from Revelry, an amazing flask with a built-in stash compartment! Let’s get one thing set right off the bat. Anything with a built-in stash compartment is cool. Like that tiny pocket on your jeans. Or a kangaroo pouch. And I’m not just .
STEALTHY KEYCHAIN PIPE
Tiny, Swedish, discreet. no I’m not ISO a sketchy masseuse (unless you know someone). I’m describing the super cool Piece Pipe keychain pipe! When it’s closed, this tiny pipe just looks like a regular keychain. And you know how much we love stuff that looks like other stuff (like this vaporizer that looks like an .
SMOKER’S SURVIVAL KIT
Look at this nifty little thing! This is the Smoker’s Survival Kit, and it’s all you’ll need to survive the apocalypse (depending on your priorities). The Smoker’s Survival Kit is water tight and built out of super strong, high-grade impact resistant material, which really helps to keep the zombies from getting into .
AIRVAPE KEYCHAIN VAPORIZER
Um, did somebody just say keychain vaporizer? No? Oh crap okay lemme say it. Keychain vaporizer. You may geek out now. Because this thing is so cool, yes a tiny little discreet vaporizer that looks and acts just like a keychain. Except that it gets you high. In which case it acts just like 2 chainz. The AirVape OM .
LOCKING STASH BAG
This Silverton stash bag from Stashlogix has a lot going for it. It’s smell-proof, it locks, it’s got adjustable dividers, it’s got a gasket sealing system. and I haven’t even mentioned the included poker tool. There’s an included poker tool!! Also, it’s pretty dope looking – especially since it doesn’t look like .
Check out this selection of discrete pipes, stealthy weed gadgets and secret smoking devices.